"Yeah nah nah yeah nah"

-Mike Nolan
  Mike Nolan
Mike Nolan

"FTC MATE FTC! Film The Cops!"

Gender Male
Hair Black Hair

Place of Birth


Occupation Tradie, councilman
Family Unknown father
First Appearance "Meet Mike Nolan "
Status Alive
Series lifespan "Meet Mike Nolan " to Present

Voiced by

Jarrad Wright

Michael "Mike" Nolan, (better known to Leslie Mackerel and his associates as "Nolezy"), is a 52-year old engineer working in the local area of Brown Town. Mike Nolan is the single most skits cunt in the history of the world, even more than Crazy Steve.

He seems to own several firearms (shotguns mainly), and is an extremely heavy smoker having been on the tobacco for 48 years. His favorite cigarettes are Winnie Blues. He always stores a doobie in the Winnie Bllues box. He never exhales unless he is smoking white oxe no filter or Marlbro' Reds.

Whilst he seems on the down-low, Nolan is especially fond of going out with Lez and the Sasquatches and at one point had planned a trip to Thailand (to get a ripstart), which was how he became stranded on Choomah Island when the plane crashed. Nolezy has a good friendship with Donny, as seen during Season 2.

Mike Nolan features in his own show, "The Mike Nolan Show", where three characters resembling Jarrad Wright, Tom Hollis, and Izak Whear document his day to day life with a series of interviews and adventures.

Mike nolan goes to esc and he loves ebony. Mike dreams of going to Thailand to get a ripstart.

Life Edit

Childhood Edit

Nolezy was born on an unknown date, possibly during the 1950-60s, in Queensland, Australia. He dropped out of school in Grade 2 to join his dad as a councilman/tradesman. He took up smoking at the age of 4 (probably passively) and learnt most of his trade and skills from Crazy Steve.

Before Choomah Island Edit

Nolezy visited the club Nooverland in Queensland with Lez, Sassy and Donnie on a Tuesday night, there he spoke of his upcoming trip to Thailand and performed a stand-up gig, beating back a heckler and insulting Christianity.

Choomah Island Edit

Around about the time Lez had discovered Nolezy was missing, the 52-year old never made it to Thailand and was instead, somehow marooned upon Choomah Island. Having set up camp, Nolezy used his arsenal of illegal weapons to fend off Choomahs.

He was later found by Leslie on Choomah Island after he saved Lez from a pack of choomah's by blowing up their faces with a shotgun, He then proceeded to show Lez he had set up a campsite on a hill with a shotgun and more cigarettes explaining to the latter: "you need three things to survive on this island: a gun, ammunition, and a pack of smokes".

Later, he meets up with Sassy and Donny on the beach after being separated from Lez and greet each other. Clarence then arrives in his tinnie, Mike isn't happy and mumbles "oh fuck it's Clarence". He then escapes with Lez, Sassy and Donny when the Choomahs over run them, leaving Clarence on the island.

As they speed away from the island Lez then asks Nolezy if he wants to help with a 'project' (the spaceship) he is working on which Nolzey asks "what sort of project?" indicating he has accepted Lez's offer.

The Space Ship Edit

Nolezy, having initiated basic repairs, tells Lez they're going to need a lot of money to repair it fully, Lez asks how and Nolezy replies by saying "the only way I know how mate". Later Lez wins big at the pokies ($100 million) enough to repair the spaceship. While Lez and Sassy's crew (minus Donny who legged it before he could be arrested) were in prison Nolezy and Donny repaired the spaceship.

The Volcano Bong and the Battle of Brown Town Edit

Nolezy was meant to go on the voyage to Kingdom Cum but stayed back to hit the volcano bong instead.

He wasn't present for the Battle of Brown Town, but he did manage to steal a Bell-47 Helicopter after hitting the Volcano Bong (at level according to Sassy of 'start seeing shit' and said he was 'off his fucken head cunt') and used it to evacuate Lez, The Sasquatches, Warning guy and his cousin Sergio from the roof of a pink building.

Choomah Island 2 Edit

In Choomah Island 2, Nolezy brings his tough characteristics to the team as they prepare to board the plane that Sergio and Warning Guy pilot to the island. On the plane, Mike is seen sporting his shades, shorts, and without his usual high-vis shirt. He also wraps his green shirt around his head, before confessing his hatred for police officers after his tattoo is noted by Lez.

Later on, Nolan confesses his dream about hanging with the rest of the blokes whilst high on mushrooms. He states how he wishes his dream were more like real life, and how everyone is connected.

Once the gang (minus Lez) are set up in tents, it is Mike that witnesses their plane crash in the forests, after being ambushed by a Choomah. A few hours later, he and the rest of the boys awake, having their tents surrounded by Choomahs. Nolezy is quick to react and open fires on the creatures with his six-shooter, encouraging the Choomahs to fight back, calling them "cunts" and "dogs". Wayno and the rest of the gang join in against the onslaught of Choomahs, before being saved by a helicopter being piloted by Daednu.

After Choomahviathan is destroyed by Clarence, Mike meets up with Lez, Sergio and Warning Guy on the beach of Brown Town near the light house. Nolezy then reveals that all of the gang knew about Microsoft Paint as Lez begins to explain his discoveries in the trip scene.

Personality Edit

Mike Nolan is your typical laid-back, true-blue, Aussie bloke. He is a mad bastard, I try to be like him every day. I too have a fuck cops tattoo across my chest in honor of the great man. He is very outgoing, loyal with his friends and will always offer assistance in repairing things. Mike is always keen to try new things with his mates wherever it be. Mike also possesses a bit of a tough side during battles on Choomah Island. He is rugged and won't shy away from a chance to swear, being one of the most vulgar characters of the show. He is high in "no-nonsense".


It is also apparent that Mike Nolan has a particular disliking to police officers. In "Choomah Island 2", it is revealed that Nolezy has "FUCK COPS" tattooed across his chest. He says this is due to bad cops being on the force, and due to the corruption in the police department. This hatred may have stemmed from past events, such as those in episode 2 of The Mike Nolan Show, "F.T.C.".